Stupid pennies...

Seriously wtf is it with pennies? They're always littering up your pockets and wallet causing unnecissary jingling and excess weight. Whenever you go to reach into your pocket to say pay for a parking meter, you always come up with a handful of ugly shiny little things staring back at you with beadly little maple leaf eyes. Of course you count them up only to realize your are two cents short. Two freaking cents which could mean the difference between the ultimate fate of a parking ticket and the reassurance that your car won't have mysteriously dissapeared out of thin air when you return.

The vending machines won't take them either, leaving you standing there in utter dissapointment with a watering mouth looking at the delicious chocolate that's staring you down, teasing you. You can almost hear it laughing at you because the only thing separating you between divine satisfaction and starvation is a bloody pane of glass and five fucking cents that makes the vending machine sick.

In the end, it all come down to the pennies. They are the coppery annoying works of pure evilness.

Oh and get this. Today I saw a lovely shiny penny right in the middle of the floor so I just had to bend down to pick it up. And guess what happened when I stood back up. Freaking whacked my head on the god damned table.

You know what they say, find a penny pick it up, all day long you'll have good luck. Spork that, it's just an evil plot. Those pennies, they're all coming up with this evil plot to piss off all of humanity. They're coming to invade all of our change and mulitply so we will have a giant mountain of hideous shiny brown-ness that we can do nothing with. If you take a look at your change jar, they're already at work. They've dominated over half the change you already have. It can only get worse from here. Pretty soon there will be no other coins left and the change world will be dominated by those unsightly little buggers.

We'd better do something about it before it's too late! All you rats and other creatures out there, gather up your pennies and prepare for a massive copper spork manufacturing fest!

Pennies are the shit of all change. You pay for something with a larger amount of money and what do you get in change? Always pennies. They're what's left over as waste and there's really nothing you can do with them. You put in a larger bill or coin into a vending machine or pay for something and it shits out pennies.