Time to gnome things up...GNOMES they be vile

Okay now hear this for I shall give you all why I think gnomes are vile and why they must be hunted down

1. Those really tall lawn gnomes sure they guard your lawn but secretly they plan to join the NBA and thus widen there grip on gnoming the world

2. there vile little gnome spit sure it may be all colorful but once you step in it will either be ewwww *does a silly little dance* I just stepped in vile gnome spit or oh god ahhhhhh *runs around* it burns it burns little do you know sometimes that vile gnome spit is quite acidic

3. They steal your underwear

4. they can cleverly disguise them selves as you kids gi joe or even barbie doll O_o....Don't ask why they just can

5. they have a horrible fashion statement come on pointy little hat and tunic thing oh so out now pirate clothes now that's hot....*ahem* sorry about that I meant to say pirate clothes now that's more like it yarrghh


6. The way they stand in your garden motionless and those beady little eyes just watching you...maybe even following you then *BAM* you get smacked in the head with the end of the rake see there that's what the gnomes do that's there silly little game of smack the poor human with the rake


7. Flesh eating gnome lice you know folks that skeeter bite you have on ya is probably really not a skeeter bite it's probably that flesh eating gnome lice!!!! that's gotten to you and you wanna know why cause you never followed the fellow captain larry bobs warning signs a gnome has been in your house

8. Gnome gas ya you got that right the most vile of all there gnome gas you may think it's the dog or cat but oooooo no its that dang blasted vile gnome who runs around so quickly and then lets one of those go you swear you just been knocked back in to the 1980's

9. *hears footsteps* oh no they come after me noooooooo spare me noooooooo *runs*

*the sounds of many footsteps shouting and quick get the tranquilizer are heard followed by crashing and more screaming*


10. A little gnome pops up dressed like the men in black no this is the gnome in black he pulls a little de nerulizer and flashes it at you "You have not seen this message and gnomes are really not vile what you have been reading has been nothing but the rants of a raving nutball"